So, there are about 101 stylish stories to write, and of course there being way more than 101 writers, they all get written a lot. One of my personal favorites is a riff on the False Piety Piece, which can be laid down anytime there's a new bishop in the archdiocese (The new guy is unimpeachable, but he represents the old hierarchy, which endorses frying and eating small children); a good-hearted sports star signs a fat contract (Joe Blow's only done good things for our city, but Frank Jones turned into a psychotic ax-killer when he got that five-year deal in 1931); etc.
Today's contestant is a USA Today spiel on how "Eco-friendly events can leave large, unfriendly footprints"
I'm sure it is true, of course, but, um: No shit, Sherlock. Have you ever been to a rock show? A balloon festival? A hunters' blind at the end of the season? My front yard? Yours?
Merely the existence of a major crowd-drawer necessarily means waste, harm and general badness. But maybe the eco-friendly events spur people to make wiser choices down the road, ultimately paying for the one-time cost, and maybe paying it many times over.
Would you say no to a washing machine that would pay for itself in two years via energy and water efficiency just because you had to drive to a nearby city to buy it for $200 more than a cheap, inefficient alternative?
I suspect not, but I'm sorry to see my colleagues in print are disinclined to go the extra mile in their own work.
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