Friday, July 28, 2006

In search of a sport for which steroids won't help

OK, baseball, football, basketball, hockey, tennis, swimming, sledding, skiing, track and field, bicycling, rugby, lacrosse, soccer, boxing, skating, rowing, fencing, gymnastics, weightlifting (duh), wrestling, volleyball - all these are out. Even table tennis and badminton are probably on the list of steroids-could-help-you sports, if you are one of the serious, non-back yard types.

And I can't say I think golf, darts, curling, shuffleboard, bowling, shooting, sailing, polo, riding and other such games and pastimes really count as sports, even if your conditioning is superb (and maybe steroids would help you after all). I guess the latter sorts fall in with racing cars, which certainly requires mind-boggling conditioning but isn't really a "sport" either, at least in the Platonic sense I have in mind.

So what's that leave?

Archery? No, alas, even bows and arrows have their troubles: Mark Hainline was busted (for refusing a test) in 2005. Jai alai? I don't think so.

I must be missing something good.

6 comments:

Holly said...

How about being a jockey? Horseracing - is that a sport?

Daphne said...

Horseback riding IS a sport! Steroids won't help you, especially if you are a jockey because the point is to be as light as possible, so your horse carries more "dead" weight i.e. the strips of weights they place under the saddle to bring the horse up to the weight given by the handicapper because that weight does not shift in a race and potentially knock a horse off-stride like a heavier jockey might.

And with other horseback riding sports like dressage, cross country, stadium jumping, team penning, etc. its finesse and the ability to chart a course perfectly that wins. Not brute strength. Having played polo I don't really think having huge muscles gives that big of an advantage, its all about having a fast, agile horse with tons of stamina that is manuverable enough to set you up for good shots yet bold/strong enough to make contact with the other horses and hold his ground.

The only place steroids might crop up in in racing. But then again most of what they use are "milkshakes" laced with drugs that help oxygenate the blood, etc.

Just my horseback riding two cents :o)

Alasdair said...

Hmmm. OK, I guess I'll take racing, from the people's perspective. But what about doping the horses?

Daphne said...

I guess some trainers do dope the horses...

psychgrad said...

I vote that curling IS a sport. It requires bursts of energy, precision, strength, foresight, team communication, etc...

Holly said...

I'm generally not one to point out differences (I like to spot similarities), but *do* think there's a difference between a game and a sport. I don't know what my definitions of sport and game are, but like someone said of porn, I know it when I see it ;-) And, I think being a jockey is a job, curling is a game, and anything for which steroids improves performance is a sport. So, by my just-made-up definition, there is no such thing as a sport for which steroids won't help!